A Change
2002-05-06 - 9:30 p.m.
I think I've come into a new way of thinking the past two days... something that, since it's lasted more than two minutes, seems like it might turn into my new life. I had marathon envy again yesterday, and with that, I've decided to run again. Yes, just like last year... but, this time I'm doing it. And, I had been doing it for a bit before the marathon. And, I'm only going to continue doing it bit by bit... inching my way up to 26 miles. I'm going to do it slow and right this time.. especially since I'm two years older, way out of practice, 55 pounds heavier and seeming to have more and more knee pain. I'll stretch more. I'll be able to eat healthy because I'll have the money to do so...
And, with all of this thinking, I've decided I must take control of my life and start doing something with it. I think my problem is that things have always happened to me (or at least it seemed that way). I was in a world class guard, nothing hard... just three hours of practice four days a week and all day on Saturdays. Nothing to it... that's all I ever knew. Then, came Miami. Again, something easy. I didn't have to really try hard to get in... I just did. Sure, I could have done a helluva lot better while there... but, I did it. Too many of my friends dropped out, switched schools, took 4+ years, etc. Then, there was Booie - just there and just perfect for me. And, of course the tv jobs... kind of just fell in my lap. A resume here, a resume there... WA LA! Job. Not as if I've never worked for anything in my life... because I have. I worked hard for all of those things... but, working hard felt easy. So, now I must work twice as hard... and, I'll be lucky to reap half the rewards I'm used to. But, I have to start doing things for me. Doing things for my career, etc. The first step comes with really looking into personal training. I want to do it. I'm comfortable doing it. I love doing it with Shelley... I feel like the stuff I'm telling her is easy stuff because it is for me. But, she is dumbfounded that I know all of that stuff... I just do. Yet, I couldn't tell you the first thing about managing a classroom - Shelley's got that down pat. So, I must elaborate on what I do well. So, I am.
