life pretty much sucks right now, but it'll be okay
2007-03-24 - 4:34 p.m.
I am scared and sad. But, I am trying to be okay. I am just doing the next best thing and going on. I didn't get out of bed today until 2 p.m. I just couldn't. But, I am better now. I went on a walk and, stopped at Walgr33ns and bought a bunch of crap, but kinda stuff i needed. For $27. One thing I know for sure is that my car was totalled for a reason. Not only so I would have extra money to buy $27 worth of crap, but so that i could go back and forth between here and my parents' house with no worries about gas money.
I talked to my dad. He's got a yeast infection and says he is scared. That was hard to hear. He is so very tired too. Tomorrow, I will go home and spend some time with him and my family and maybe go see my aunt and uncle (the one who's got the stage IV melanoma) and just deal. I don't think it's gonna be too much longer before my dad is gone. I've just got a hunch. He's taught me so much, and I need to let him know that. He's helped me to become the person I am and the person i am becoming. the only thing i wish i had learned from him is how to change a tire. he always wanted to teach me, but i never took the time to learn it from him. now, it's too late. but, i guess if that's the only thing i'm concerned about him not teaching me, that's not such a bad deal. i just wish i had taken the time. i am happy i've got time now, to spend with him. that we got a warning. some don't get warnings - their parents just drop over dead. i get some time. and that is as nice as it can be, i suppose.
