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This totally wasn't supposed to be a sob-story-entry...

2005-02-20 - 1:47 p.m.

Yup, I never update anymore. Knowing that someone who shouldn't have been reading was, scared me into keeping my mouth shut. I really should just lock the damn thing, then I won't have to worry.
Life has been okay lately. I was sick all last week, but managed to get through the week, taking just 1.5 days off of work, AND scoring an 89 on my anatomy lab exam. Go me.
Tomorrow, I've got to get through a micro exam and then, I'm home free for a while. Okay, just for a week - next week, I've got a micro lab exam and an anatomy lecture exam. Then, it's my birthday. I'll be 30. I hope I find my niche by the time I'm 40. Sometimes, I feel so lost in this world. I don't know what's right and what's wrong and who to believe and who to hate and who to love and who to be. It's scary and it's paralyzing most times. 'Cause I don't want to fuck up so bad, that I just don't do anything. And, I sit. And then, I turn 30 and 40 and 50 and 60 and 70 and what if I figure it all out when I'm 70? THEN, what do I do? 70 years wasted. I'm tired of wasting my life. I just wish I knew how to make something of it.

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